Finding the balance between over-controlling and under-controlling can be tough.
Tower commands like “I’ll call your base”, “Extend downwind”, “Extend upwind”, ect. are commands you can use to control your pattern. Those are the tools at your disposal. When to use them can be unclear though.
The goal is to send the least commands possible, while still being concise and clear. You want your pilots to know what you want from them, take the onus off of them, but only send commands when it is necessary.
Over-control by sending unnecessary superfluous commands that will overcomplicated things, or under-control and let your pattern become a hot mess. It’s can be hard to balance it out. See something, do something.
Be proactive not reactive.